But God has been teaching me things about my shyness, especially in the past two years.
The first thing He showed me is that "a man that hath friends must show himself friendly..." (Proverbs 18:24) When I learned this, I could count all my friends, family included, on two hands, and I desperatley wanted more. So, for purely selfish reasons, I let go of a tiny bit of my shyness, and started being sort-of friendly.
Another thing I learned is that I can't minister to others if I'm busy nursing my fear of them. I mean, if I notice a girl sitting alone in a corner, that is a perfect opportunity to reach out to her and show her the love of God. If I'm busy being shy right then, I completly miss that chance to do good for my Father's cause.
The last thing I learned is that my shyness could keep me out of Heaven. Shyness if you get down to it, is selfishness. It is thinking about what "self" wants, and what makes "self" happy, before thinking about others and what makes them happy. Shyness also prohibits a person from fulfiling the Great Comission, because if he/she is shy, they can't teach all nations, since they are frightened of other people.
As I was contemplating the things God taught me about being shy, I realized that shyness is really apotheosis. It is elevating my comfort level above God and His plans for me. It is placing my fear of people above His love of them. It is putting myself in a position where I can't fulfill His will...in a position where the only will I can fulfill is my own.
I still have a hard time talking to strangers. I still don't like being by myself in a new situation. And even though I have the most friends of everyone in my family, I still have to choke down my shyness every time I meet someone new. I know that God wants me to leave behind my fear of people, and put Him first...not myself.
No comments:
Post a Comment