Apotheosis (v. 2.0)

You probably wouldn't guess, but I am about as shy as it gets. Up until I was about 14 or 15, I literally hid behind Mama whenever we met new people. Even now, at 19, it still physically hurts to talk to strangers.

But God has been teaching me things about my shyness, especially in the past two years.

The first thing He showed me is that "a man that hath friends must show himself friendly..." (Proverbs 18:24) When I learned this, I could count all my friends, family included, on two hands, and I desperatley wanted more. So, for purely selfish reasons, I let go of a tiny bit of my shyness, and started being sort-of friendly.

Another thing I learned is that I can't minister to others if I'm busy nursing my fear of them. I mean, if I notice a girl sitting alone in a corner, that is a perfect opportunity to reach out to her and show her the love of God. If I'm busy being shy right then, I completly miss that chance to do good for my Father's cause.

The last thing I learned is that my shyness could keep me out of Heaven. Shyness if you get down to it, is selfishness. It is thinking about what "self" wants, and what makes "self" happy, before thinking about others and what makes them happy. Shyness also prohibits a person from fulfiling the Great Comission, because if he/she is shy, they can't teach all nations, since they are frightened of other people.

As I was contemplating the things God taught me about being shy, I realized that shyness is really apotheosis. It is elevating my comfort level above God and His plans for me. It is placing my fear of people above His love of them. It is putting myself in a position where I can't fulfill His will...in a position where the only will I can fulfill is my own.

I still have a hard time talking to strangers. I still don't like being by myself in a new situation. And even though I have the most friends of everyone in my family, I still have to choke down my shyness every time I meet someone new. I know that God wants me to leave behind my fear of people, and put Him first...not myself.

Apotheosis

Apotheosis. 

It's a somewhat intimidating word. It refers to the exaltation of a subject to a divine level. Some examples:

I am naturally an obsessive person, and the first thing that I remember obsessing about were Legos. Don't get me wrong, Legos are probability the greatest toy ever invented, but I took it to excess. All I did every spare minute was build with Legos, think about Legos, talk about Legos, read the Lego magazine, etc. My parents (who as I said before are very smart people) decided to make me stop playing, reading, thinking, and living in my Lego world. It hurt for awhile, but as I got over it I moved on to other things, like music.

Music was not my first choice for a hobby, but even so I grew to adore it more than Legos. It got so bad at one point that in the middle of Sabbath School I would pull out a piece of paper and write down a chord progression! My life was fully possessed by music. Once again, my parents intervened and several times removed music and then reinstated it into my life.

Apotheosis is something that we are all prone to. Everyone has had something that takes the place that only God should hold. The only prescription for apotheosis is loving God. If we are willing to let go of the things that hold us, love for Him will give us freedom.

Short Quotes

I've been collecting a bunch of short quotes in my readings, and I'd like to share some of them with you. (I've been reading a lot of Spurgeon lately :)

A Christian sluggard? Is there such a being?

~Charles Spurgeon

If you truly belong to Christ, you will have opportunities for witnessing for Him.

~E. G. White

The man who might do most for God, if he were renewed, will bring forth the most for Satan if he be left alone.

~Charles Spurgeon

You can't minister to others while nursing your fear of them.

~NDW

God expects those who bear the name of Christ to represent Him.

~E. G. White

To look into the face of man without first having seen the face of God is very dangerous...

~Charles Spurgeon